A lift home

~ Elaine Jeremiah

Hi all. Hope your week’s gone OK so far. I’ve been doing all right. I’ve made some progress with Teaching Mr Leavis  and I’m beginning to have at least a vague sense of where I want the story to go and how it’s going to get there. Thank  you all for your advice re first drafts – it was very helpful to have my instinct to stick with the first draft until I’ve finished it confirmed.

So for today I thought I’d share with you 10 paragraphs for the month from Teaching Mr Leavis. This scene takes place about a page on from where last week’s excerpt finished which you can read here. To see the excerpt before that go here.

In this scene Rebecca has left the club and is making her way home when she hears someone call her name. When she realises who it is her heart sinks…

‘Mr Leavis,’ Rebecca replied, her voice coming out as a groan. She didn’t care if he noticed. He walked up to her until he was standing only a few feet away. The dull orange glow from the streetlamps didn’t give her much light to see by, but nonetheless Rebecca got another good look at Jonathan Leavis.

She had to admit to herself – albeit grudgingly – that he wasn’t a bad-looking man. He was tall and had a good figure. His hair was almost black and, although short, wavy. His striking eyes were the same colour. She surmised that he was in his early forties, though he was one of those people whose age was indeterminate.

He cut a powerful figure, although he seemed a little worse for wear tonight. Maybe it was just the poor light. But he looked almost a little haggard to Rebecca, and she wondered how often he went to his club, how much he’d had to drink.  

A half-smile was on his lips; his expression was friendly enough, but Rebecca really wasn’t in the mood to have a verbal sparring match. Feeling a wave of fatigue hit her again, she cleared her throat and tried not to sound hostile as she spoke.

‘Mr Leavis, what do you want? It’s late, I’m tired and I need to go home.’

‘Would you like me to take you home?’ Jonathan asked her, giving her direct look that made her feel as though he could glimpse her soul.

Rebecca said nothing, just gawped at him. Had she heard him right? Was that really the parent from hell, Jonathan Leavis, asking her if she wanted a lift home? He has been drinking, she reminded herself, shaking her head to try and clear it of confusion.

‘I’ll take that as a no then,’ he said, pursing his lips and beginning to turn away.

Rebecca thought quickly, weighing up the pros and cons. If she went home with Jonathan she’d have to put up with his questions and general talk. Also he would see where she lived, another downside. But if she chose to get a taxi home, she’d have to wait a while for one to turn up – they weren’t all that frequent in this part of town – and it would be expensive.

‘Wait, Jonathan,’ she said, wincing as she realised she’d used his Christian name without meaning to. He turned back; she saw a half-smile creasing his lips and silently berated herself for slipping up. But she swallowed any biting comment she would have liked to make. ‘Yes, I would like a lift home, thank you.’

WIPpet Wednesday is open to everyone who would like to share some of their writing on their blog. If you want to join in, just post some of your recent writing on your blog. Ideally it should relate in some way to the date. Then add your name to this.

K. L. Schwengel is our lovely hostess. 😀

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Published by Elaine Jeremiah

I live with my husband and dog in the UK. I'm the author of four novels, my latest being a Jane Austen fan fiction time travel romance, 'Love Without Time'.

26 thoughts on “A lift home”

    1. Yes, she’s finding him very confusing. At this point she strongly dislikes him, wants to avoid him and then he goes and offers her a lift home. She can’t make him out. And yes he is a smug, smarmy git!

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    1. Technically he’s not drunk but she doesn’t know that – he’s got some issues hence the haggard face. She knows he’s had a drink, so as far as she’s concerned he could be sozzled! 😀

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  3. Mr Leavis is an intriguing sort of chap! I enjoyed your description of him, and the gentle pressure his presence seemed to have on the situation. I have a feeling Rebecca is going to have her work cut out for her on the drive home 🙂

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  4. And it gets interesting! Though when you talk about his figure, that to me is typically a word associated with describing a female body(right or wrong). Maybe physique would be better?

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    1. Yeah maybe it would. I was vaguely thinking along those lines myself, but sometimes I find it hard to pin my mind down and think clearly about how I’m describing my characters!

      Thanks for the comment. 🙂

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  5. Very conflicted emotional reaction here, good job. But I have to admit, I kept thinking how I would never take a lift from a guy coming from a bar when I didn’t know how much he’d had to drink! Would it be totally out of character for her to ask him? Otherwise she’s putting her life in his hands only to save some time and some quid! 🙂

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    1. You make a good point Ruth. Hmm… maybe you’re right – I think it would be a good idea for her to ask him if he’s drunk. And no it would not be out of character! Thanks for the tip! Glad you appreciated the excerpt. 🙂

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  9. If she asked him if he was drink, and he said no, would she believe him? That could add even more conflict, because he knows he’s not, but she asked and won’t trust him…

    These two are all tangled up in knots….except it seems to be bothering Rebecca way more than him.,,,except that he’s rather hard to read, so maybe he really is bothered…

    And now I’m all knotty, too….

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  11. Is he drunk? Just kidding, lol, I was just asking because I saw everyone else was. 🙂 I’m very interested in finding out more about Mr. Leavis. Great excerpt!

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  12. I noticed in the other comments you said you’d changed it a bit to reflect her asking how much he’s had to drink. I was actually going to bring that up too. Guess I don’t need to! LOL

    It’s obvious how conflicted she is about him. I can related to that. Why are we so often drawn to people (not just in romance but as friends) who make us both wary and interested?

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    1. Yeah, no need to flag that up lol. Though I think many years ago it wouldn’t have been a problem – people are much more aware nowadays of the effects of alcohol and driving etc. Which is good of course!

      I’m glad that Rebecca’s conflicted feelings come across – that’s what I’m aiming for. She’s very distrustful of Mr Leavis at this point, particularly after the way he’s treated her so far! And I think you’re right – people often are attracted to other people who’re maybe a little bit dangerous/potentially not good for them. But that’s what makes them interesting! 🙂

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