OK so last week I promised you a longer excerpt from Reunion this week. Using my clever WIPpet maths, I’ve come up with 4 paragraphs from chapter 14: 2+2=4 (amazing that, I can do maths!!) and obviously chapter 14 for the year. 🙂
I have something to tell you that made me frown. I’ve told ReGi already… I did some searching on Amazon just to check and there’s another book out there called Reunion with a plot that’s not completely dissimilar to mine. 😦 ReGi was kindly trying to help me come up with another title. My husband reckons it doesn’t matter too much if I have a subtitle with it.
But… aargh! I kind of get the feeling that if I don’t change the title and the plot stays the same (that’s one thing I’m not changing for love or money!!) then I could land myself in some hot water. *Sigh* It’s so difficult coming up with brand new inspiring titles. I need help!! Any more suggestions??
All right then, on with today’s WIPpet. This scene takes place just after Anna has had a row with her now-boyfriend Peter. These are turbulent times for her…
Waving goodbye to Peter as he made his way to the platform to catch the train back to London, Anna felt relief wash over her. Relief quickly replaced by guilt. She shouldn’t feel relieved that he was going – he was her boyfriend for goodness sake – but she was. Turning away from his disappearing form, she began to make her way out of the station. The cold dry weather they’d been experiencing had turned to cold wet weather and it was beginning to rain. Anna pulled her hood up and dashed to her car.
She used the journey home to brood over Peter’s visit and how it had made her feel. Remembering their love making, her face grew hot. There was certainly nothing wrong in that department. But why oh why had he felt it necessary to try to bestow expensive trinkets on her? And more importantly, why should it matter to her if he did?
As these thoughts were whirling around her head, Anna was startled by a horn blasting at her. Shocked, she realised she’d been drifting into the opposite lane on the road. Get a grip, Anna, she told herself. Forget about Peter and concentrate on driving if you want to make it home. She banished the troubling thoughts from her head and focused her attention on getting home safely.
When she reached the safety of her driveway, Anna turned the engine off and sat there for a moment in silence, staring blankly at her garage door. I could have been killed, she thought. This obsessing about Peter could have cost me my life. Slowly, she got out of the car and leaned against it for a moment as if for support, ignoring the cold of its metal shell.
Thanks as always for having a look at my work, all comments gratefully received! Anyone can take part in WIPpet Wednesday. All you’ve got to do is share a bit of your work that relates in some way to the date. Then add your details to this. Be sure to take a look at what the other WIPpeteers are sharing. Thank you, thank you, thank you K. L. Schwengel for hosting! 🙂
Elaine Jeremiah 
Eek! Eyes on the road, woman! Obsessing while driving is not a good thing. Feels like she’s not all that convinced Peter is the one for her.
Title…instead of the event, what are some of the emotions it will bring? Or what is a conflict that has to be overcome? Maybe there’s something useable in that.
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Yes, staying alive is DEFINITELY more important than stressing about b/f. Thanks for the advice re title. I’ll get my thinking cap on!
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Oh Anna. It sounds like the handwriting’s on the wall for you, girl, about Peter, . . .
I’m sorry you have to change your title. I was trying to think of synonyms for reunion (like “Homecoming”). Kathi’s advice is good. You can also consider a street name or town name, if the name of the street or town evokes a strong emotion.
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Ah thank you, that’s helpful. I’ll think long and hard about the title change. Obviously it’s something I’ve got to get right. 🙂
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That’s not a good combination obsessing and being angry at her boyfriend while driving. I’m intrigued what the argument was about and it’s very telling that Anna was relieved to wave him off. Definitely real trouble brewing there!
I feel your pain regarding your title having just re-thought mine for Time Shifters. I think Kathi’s idea is good. From what we’ve read in the WIPpets so far Reunion is the obvious choice but there seems to be a lot more going on than just that. Maybe think about what genre/genres the book is and tailor the title towards that?
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Thanks for the advice Kate. I think I’m going to need to brainstorm some ideas about what to call it. You never know – I might think up an even better title! And glad you liked the excerpt. I was a bit kinder with it today! 😉
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You were kinder with the exerpt. I liked the fact that the trinket gave her that all isn’t what it should be feeling – and then you let it play out. Poor Anna, glad it didn’t turn into a real car wreck. And best of luck with the title. I think the others have made good suggestions, but I have to say I find titles really hard too. Good luck.
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It’s good to be kind! 😉 I’m glad you enjoyed it. It’s good for me to realise that I’m not the only one who finds titles difficult.
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I’m struggling with title woes myself. What about adding a few words to “Reunion” – say, “Reunion of the Heart” or “Reunion with Yesterday” or something such as that?
When she thinks about him bestowing trinkets on her I was a bit taken aback, since this is an obvious show of affection. Maybe – ‘why did he feel the need to shower her with trinkets?’ or ‘what was it about her that made him feel the need to give her trinkets? Just a thought.
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Thanks for your comment, Xina. Your title suggestions are good. 🙂 And thanks for your thoughts on that part about the trinkets. It’s not the trinket itself that bothers Anna, more the price of it; she feels uncomfortable with it and Peter doesn’t understand that.
Maybe readers wouldn’t understand why she’d feel so strongly about that, so I may need to rephrase that line.
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I’m changing my novel title for the same reason! And I just have to point out that if she is in the UK, when she drifted to the wrong side, it really was the right side!! 🙂
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Argh, sorry, that last comment was me. I had this great idea to try to set up a wordpress website to promote my friends’ books, and now wordpress comments hates me…
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No prob, I thought it was funny (see comment below!!). 🙂
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I spose that’s kind of logical. But I’m so used to driving this way, even with using a manual car so I don’t really have a problem with it. Anyway it’d be too expensive to switch to driving on the right. 🙂
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Ha ha… you may drive on the right side of the road, but we drive on the correct side lol! 🙂
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Are you sure about that? Given that the majority of people are right-handed and western societies read/write toward the right, it seems more sensible to drive on the right. 😛
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Stressing/obsessing to the point of near-death is probably not something you look for in a relationship. I have the same trinket issue with my other half, he has this habit of buying ALL THE THINGS for EVERYONE but doesn’t understand when I try to explain to him why the recipients then feel awkward about it.
Titles are the bane of my existence, so I’m afraid I won’t be much help there. Hope you come up with something you like!
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No exactly. I like what you say about the trinket issue with your other half. I guess different people react in different ways to gifts. It depends who’s giving them and how long they’ve known them partly I think.
Anna’s problem is that she hasn’t been with her b/f for very long and she feels it’s too much too soon.
And I agree with you about titles – they’re the bane of my life too!! I’ll let you know how I get on with thinking up another one. 🙂
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I really, really want to read this whole story. That was a fantastic excerpt, and this looks like my kind of book. I’m sorry you have to change the title. For me, that’s usually the last thing I do, because I am awful at naming things. I recently realized I had written 2 different short stories–set in the same “world”– with characters that shared a name. It was confusing, so I had to change one. Misery ensued. I hope you’re able to come up with a good one.
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Ah thank you Amy. So glad you feel that way about my book. It spurs me on to keep going. I’m sorry I have to change the title too – I like ‘Reunion’. Never mind, I’ll think of another one. I’ve plenty of inspiration from you guys to help me. 🙂
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The title “Reunion” does have the virtue of being quick and easy to remember. It flows well, but there seems to be so much more to the story than just the high school reunion. A lot of relationship conflicts..
I liked this scene a lot. The best paragraph… the last. The way she sat and felt the after-effects of her near-collision…. Thing is, I would think she would be obsessing about that some for the rest of the drive and you didn’t give us that, Elaine.
How about Reluctant? Or Resistant? Because Anna seems to both to many things…
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So glad you liked this Eden. Not sure what you mean by obsessing about ‘that’ for the rest of the drive, do you mean about Peter? Because she is obsessing about him – it’s why she nearly got herself killed.
Anyway, many thanks for the advice re my title. That helps. 🙂
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I like Xina’s suggestions. 🙂
Yeah… driving on the wrong side of the road = bad. It seems like Anna stresses over a lot of situations, even ones that seem pleasant. Is this habit one of her things to overcome?
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Yeah, I guess maybe. This situation isn’t pleasant though, she and her b/f have rowed.
I’ve been thinking a lot about the title. Going to run some past Kate Frost later when we meet up this afternoon. Watch this space! 🙂
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It must be nice having another WIPpeteer right at your proverbial fingertips. 🙂
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Yes it’s great. Do you and Alana live far apart then? I was under the impression that you two lived quite close together. 🙂
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Now I must laugh at myself. I wasn’t thinking of Alana as her writing persona when I commented. I was actually trying to think of a way to get us together for a playdate without overcrowding my schedule. Hence, she didn’t even register as a fellow WIPpeteer right then. She registered as a fellow mom. 😛
We only live 4 miles apart and usually see each other at least once a week. Although we do talk about our writing quite a bit, it’s rarely our conversational focus. We’re more likely to swap funny stories about our kids or muse about tough/confusing spiritual stuff.
(Oddly, she also thinks of me as two nearly-separate entities and has made similar slips.)
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You sound like me, I confuse myself sometimes too lol. Hope you’ve had a good weekend. 🙂
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